Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
Sometimes I get excited
about canceled plans.
I'd be much healthier if I didn't have taste buds.
Eat glitter for breakfast and shine all day!
My Homing Pigeon
is turning out to be very popular on ebay.
I've sold it 6 times already!
I enjoy warm weather, but only to a certain degree.
The only person you should try to be better than is the one you were yesterday.
I used to wonder what font was used for the letters in Alphabet Soup, turns out it's Times New Ramen.
Had to get my knitting needles fixed. They just didn't seam right.
A friend just gave me a packet of sugar as a gift. I thought it was very sweet.
The happier you are the more beautiful you become.