Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
A new study shows that taller people sleep longer in bed.
A duck is about to cross the road. A chicken shouts "don't do it, you'll never hear the end of it !!".
90% of all the things I worry about never happen. Worrying works!
I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, The Cranberries and Eminem. I call it my trail mix.
I found stir-fry on my bed this morning. I must have been sleep wokking again.
I was going to put on a sock puppet show, but I got cold feet.
What building in New York City has the most stories? The public library.
I believe the finest shoes are made of smooth leather. My opinion will never be suede.
Honestly, my biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking.
I once dated an apostrophe. Too possessive.