Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
Couch potatoes should occasionally check under their cushions. You never know what might turnip!
A hundred baby sheep were rolling down a hill. It was a lambslide.
Where's the best place to buy a surge protector? At an outlet mall.
Love means nothing to a tennis player.
Soon airlines will start charging for emotional baggage.
I loafed around all day because I woke up on the wrong side of the bread.
I don't care how much you like the soap. Never leave a public restroom smelling your fingers.
She left a note on the fridge saying "This isn't working, goodbye". I opened it and it works just fine.
When I was young we were so poor, we sometimes only had bits of old rope to eat... I would often skip lunch
Grant me the courage to change the things I can, and a Sharpie to change the rest.