Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners
She left a note on the fridge saying "This isn't working, goodbye". I opened it and it works just fine.
When I was young we were so poor, we sometimes only had bits of old rope to eat... I would often skip lunch
Grant me the courage to change the things I can, and a Sharpie to change the rest.
My pipe dream was to become a plumber. Unfortunately, that went down the drain.
We haven't seen any Bigfoot pictures in a while. I sure hope he is OK.
Police have arrested the world tongue twister champion.
I imagine he'll be given a tough sentence.
I collect mouthwash bottles. They are kept in mint condition.
Why is there Kraft singles but no Kraft couples?
After careful consideration, manufacturers are not going to make yardsticks any longer.
Relationships are like a walk in the park. Jurassic Park.