Funny Statuses, Quotes & One-Liners

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Be the light you wish to see in the world.
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Born to dilly dally, forced to pickup the pace.
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That sounds like a you problem.
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Oh look, another opinion I didn't ask for.
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Please cancel my subscription to your issues.
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I'll get over it. I just need to be dramatic first.
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One day I am going to make onions cry.
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My flabbers have been gasted.
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If Life gives you lemons, add vodka.
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Remember when Botox was a taboo subject? Now you mention it,
and nobody raises an eyebrow.
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